Don’t comment about bitcoin here…

FYI, the latest pattern in blog comment spam here is to post generic bullshit generated comments with a name that contains the word “bitcoin”.

Just in case Akismet doesn’t pick them up, I turned on a setting that moves all comments that contain the word “bitcoin” in the comment or commenter’s name straight to the Trash folder.

Nobody should be commenting about bitcoin here anyway, but if you do, your comments will disappear immediately.

---

Edit: Note that the comments are not what they appear. Most are generic comments, generated and in no way relevant to the blog or the comment author, with comment author something like “monero vs bitcoin”, pointing to gavinmarshaldental dot com, which McAfee SiteAdviser tells me is an unsafe site. So they’re ads that are really links to malware, via generic complementary comments.

It still boggles my mind that people might fall for such crap. They are always badly worded and sometimes gibberish that isn’t relevant to the article or the comment they reply to… They rely on a reader realizing that even though the comment itself is rubbish, the comment author, such as “how to mine bitcoin”, is a link that can be clicked. And they rely on the reader being stupid enough to click that link.

Anyway, heads up idiots… A link to Gavin Marshall Dental Practice that promises secure bitcoin mining via a comment that refers to people, places and things not referenced in the article it responds to, or is a generic complimentary comment that can be posted to any blog, is not what it seems.

Here’s an example from one of the thousands of gavin marshall dental practice scam comments…

I was wondering if you ever thought of changing the structure of your website? Its very well written; I love what youve got to say. But maybe you could a little more in the way of content so people could connect with it better. Youve got an awful lot of text for only having one or 2 pictures. Maybe you could space it out better?
[Comment author link not shown]

There have been plenty of others, and that was the only one in my trash folder since I cleared it and started updating this post… just to show you it really is exactly as I’ve described: irrelevant generated comments that link to a malware site.

The proper way to handle group spam

Somebody spammed Atheist & Humanist South Africa with the usual bullshit… Because presumably we atheists and humanists would love nothing more than to part with our hard-earned money and enrich some con artist who can tell us all about Jesus.

I’m not blurring out the name, because I presume that this came from a fake profile anyway.

These people calling themselves prophets seem to be a common thing here in Africa. If I switch to Soweto TV on Sundays, it’s always Prophet This and Prophet That. I like to switch over every now and then for a laugh. My son finds it quite entertaining as well.

Anyway, I hope this post leaves the image with you… Tiny John, the pint-size preserver of peace. May peace be with you… But only if you pay, kiddo’s. Your ticket to eternal salvation is only one credit card purchase away!

The most convoluted and stupid spam comment I’ve seen so far

I found this comment (in the spam folder) of my other blog:

Why can’t kids separated only by one birth year play the other.
Within the ADM system can be a methodical process
for Long-Term Athlete Development (LTAD). How to make a girl squirt Do cease surprised
if such pairings make a hyper active child.

London’s hands-on demonstrations were stimulating on several unique levels.
If she’s around along with love along with you, she’ll actively block the option for the night with Isabella and is
going to be furious when you do it anyway.

Gee, did you spot it? It’s on line three: How to make a girl squirt.

The idiot’s name links to a live stream page, and if you click through to “More info”, you can then click the link and find out how to make a girl squirt. I really don’t get it… I mean, unlike the “SEO tools” links often spammed into blog comments, these idiots actually do appear to be trying to sell some sort of product for girls who have trouble with their orgasms… I won’t link to them, but I did have a good chuckle… They’ve even managed to hide their actual product on their own stupid site. Finding it is like being a nervous thirteen year old guy trying to find a clitoris while pretending he’s done so before. Where did you say it was again?

They went to so much trouble to make their link to an adult product difficult to find (presumably so that you don’t notice that the comment is spam), that in the process they included three links in their fake user name, which triggered the blog’s spam filter anyway. (So the comment got mislaid; it fell between the cracks, just like that elusive clit.) And then hid their product on their own site, so you can’t find it if you do somehow finger their page. Morons. They live.

(Pardon the puns… Last time I complained about people who write puns that aren’t puns, without writing any myself. I figured I should make up for it.) This is not today’s proper post… The serious one, which doesn’t contain any puns, is scheduled to be published an hour after this one…

Spam really pisses me off

I still don’t have time to write… I’ve had a post in mind about how great things are going with my son and how quickly he adapted to living with me, but I’ve had such little time, it has changed around in my head too much already. It was originally supposed to be published around the one month mark, when he was with me for one month. (15th January.) Sadly, when a post changes so much in my head without even being written, I normally don’t write it at all. (So far it’s about three posts this year already that I thought out and never wrote. Not having time to write them sucks.)

Anyway, I checked out the blog stats, and even though I have no time for writing, I feel obligated to comment on the two spam comments I just deleted… (Why do they upset me? I’m not sure… They were blocked anyway, but the fact that those kinds of comments still show up leads me to despair of humanity a little, because presumably such comments are making money for some people. So spam still works, which means people actually follow those links.)

Firstly, there was one about SEO. (Search Engine Optimization.) While I suppose there are some bloggers out there who don’t know (and many like me who don’t care) about SEO, one has to ask the question: If your SEO tools are so fucking fantastic, why do you need to post comments to random blogs to advertise them? Surely, we should all be tripping over each other’s virtual heels in the search results, as we stumble over your spectacularly situated site at the top of our search results again and again? Alrighty, so we don’t search for SEO every day, but even if you do make the effort to search for “SEO tools”, those spam-marketed monstrosities do not feature. What this tells me, is that you are trying to sell tools that don’t even work, to people who don’t need them. Two wrongs might make a right, but do two redundancies relay relevance? I don’t think so.

And secondly, somebody posted a comment to my article Channelling is not real… a comment about how to lose belly fat. Because of course, the first place people are going to go, on their quest to lose their fat bellies, is an irreverent blog-post that mocks channelling and Theosophy in general. I mean, where the fuck else would you go?

I have to wonder if the spammers themselves are idiots, of if idiots are their target market. Maybe a bit of both? Surely they should realize that the probability of hitting a target, that is somebody who would actually want to read their adverts, is minimal. Surely?

A rant about spam that comes too soon

I’m really getting sick of this writing offline and posting the next day thing, but hopefully it won’t be for much longer… My new phone will arrive soon (I hope) and then I’ll be able to share my internet connection with the PC at home. Otherwise, my 20GB data, for which I paid about R1000, will expire at the end of the month. (Also, I only have up to episode 3 of Supergirl and episode 7 of American Horror Story, Hotel, and I’d like to download more rather than wasting that data.)

So since I’m writing this offline and forgot to save the URL’s, no links here. (Not that I care to link to anything about spam anyway.) I still don’t understand how there can be a market for spam blog comments. Does anybody follow the spam advert links in blog comments?

Currently I have seven spam comments on this blog:

• One of them is a generated generic complimentary comment, where the username is a link to something about hacking Facebook.
• The other six are spam comment adverts for dapoxetine, which is apparently a drug designed to prevent premature male ejaculation. (All five of these are on my post written when my Facebook login was screwed.)

It seems that blogs and blog posts about Facebook are especially targeted…

The other thing that interests me is that somebody apparently thinks that posting to random blogs, about a drug to combat premature ejaculation, will have some success. I find it highly ironic that this got to my blog, of all places. Back when I was on meth, and having a lot of sex, that’s not a problem I had. On meth, I could keep going for many hours and suppress my ejaculation for far too long. Not something I recommend, because after supressing it for too long, when you actually want to come, it hurts like hell. Anyway, this is not an issue any more… I have been merrily asexual for four years now.

But seriously, how difficult is it to stop yourself from coming too soon? I mean, slow down, for fuck’s sake… Take it out… I’m no sexpert, but as far as I can recall, a change of pace and/or position might be something she appreciates anyway.

I do question the intelligence of spammers… All the spam comments I’ve mentioned today were picked up by Akismet and ended up in my spam folder – none are actually visible on the blog; though if I Google for the text, no doubt I will find hundreds of other blogs with similar comments that did get through. But so what? What kind of person, when reading a blog and the comments, actually follows those links? And of those who follow the links, how many actually purchase whatever rubbish is being sold? Surely it can’t be many.

The curious case of the generic complimentary comment. I hate SPAM!

Recently I received this comment to one of my posts:

Hello! I’ve been reading your site for a long time now and finally got the bravery to go ahead and give you a shout out from Huffman Tx! Just wanted to say keep up the great work!

So I thought to myself, “That’s odd“. Reading this new blog for a long time? Sure, the old one redirects here, but judging by the number of page views (on average at the old blog, around 70 per day, but up to a max of about 400, while the most ever here was 15 on one day), most of my old readers haven’t found this one, and my Google indexing is pretty much gone. (Which makes me sad, by the way.) Then I followed the link, and it led to a membership page of a site that contained another link advertising a website for painters. A painters’ website in Toronto, Canada! So I’m getting a shout out from Texas advertising a website in Canada? Those crazy Canaditexans…

So sure enough, a quick search for similar comments elsewhere turned up a blog with this:

Hey there! I’ve been following your blog for some time now and finally got the bravery to go ahead and give you a shout out from Humble Texas! Just wanted to say keep up the great job!

And this:

Hello! I’ve been reading your blog for a long time now and finally got the bravery to go ahead and give you a shout out from Lubbock Texas! Just wanted to tell you keep up the excellent job!

And this:

Hi! I’ve been reading your website for a while now and finally got the courage to go ahead and give you a shout out from Huffman Texas! Just wanted to say keep up the fantastic work!

As a general rule, generic compliments in comments don’t come from readers actually reading the content and commenting, they are generated and bulk-submitted SPAM. They usually contain a single link to an ad as the commenter’s “website”. Since it’s only one link and SPAM filters like Akismet normally look for two or more, these are often not detected by SPAM filters, but any human reader/moderator/blogger can spot them. In this case, the comments were built programmatically from a template, by a despicable program (like this one) that posts comments in bulk to blogs. There are many other examples. I’m leaving the comment here for educational purposes, after removing the spammer’s URL and mailto link of course.

Two years ago Scott Hanselman wrote about such a template. This is clearly generated from that template, which the spammers are still using. Here is the relevant bit that generated all of those comments:

{Hola|Hey there|Hi|Hello|Greetings}! I’ve been {following|reading} your {site|web site|website|weblog|blog} for {a long time|a while|some time} now and finally got the {bravery|courage} to go ahead and give you a shout out from {New Caney|Kingwood|Huffman|Porter|Houston|Dallas|Austin|Lubbock|Humble|Atascocita} {Tx|Texas}! Just wanted to {tell you|mention|say} keep up the {fantastic|excellent|great|good} {job|work}!

The bottom line is this: Beware of generic compliments in comments. They are not what they seem. (I shouldn’t even have followed the link. Merely clicking may have generated revenue for somebody, via their affiliate program that pays according to the number of clicks. Also, such links may take you to porn or malware sites.) Fortunately the people who generate this kind of SPAM are idiots; were they not it might not be so easy to detect.

Then again, any generic comment that’s not related in any way whatsoever to your written content should be a huge red flag. A challenge for a good programmer would thus be to generate a comment that somehow relates to the article being commented on. (To be clear, I mean a purely intellectual challenge. Anybody who publishes or uses such a program deserves to be shot in the stomach, doused with petrol, set on fire and thrown off a cliff.) At the very least, it could quote a random paragraph of your content and then proceed to “comment” in a generic way on that content. (This would be fairly easy to do and would look more like a real comment, but might not be detected so easily fool bloggers desperate for comments.) Of course that would require actually reading your site or blog’s content, at least programatically, and would defeat the purpose and likely the profit of bulk SPAM comment publishing. (Assuming that there is a profit. Do people actually follow those SPAM comment links by clicking on the commenter’s name? Are there bloggers so desperate for comments that they appreciate generic compliments?)

Here’s the full SPAM template:

{
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I {couldn't|could not} {resist|refrain from} commenting. {Very well|Perfectly|Well|Exceptionally well} written!|
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your {rss|rss feed} as I {can not|can't} {in finding|find|to find} your {email|e-mail} subscription {link|hyperlink} or {newsletter|e-newsletter} service. Do {you have|you've} any?
{Please|Kindly} {allow|permit|let} me {realize|recognize|understand|recognise|know} {so that|in order that} I {may just|may|could} subscribe.
Thanks.|
{It is|It's} {appropriate|perfect|the best} time to make some plans for the future and {it is|it's} time to be happy.
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{blog|weblog|webpage|website|web site}, I have read all
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|
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|
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{Superb|Exceptional|Outstanding|Excellent} Blog!
|
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|
{Howdy|Hi there|Hey there|Hello|Hey} just wanted to give you a quick heads up.
 
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{Kudos|Cheers|Many thanks|Thanks}|
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{job|work}!|
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|
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{Wow|Whoa|Incredible|Amazing}! This blog looks {exactly|just} like my old one! It's on a {completely|entirely|totally} different {topic|subject} but it has pretty much the same {layout|page layout} and design. {Excellent|Wonderful|Great|Outstanding|Superb} choice of colors!|
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{You made|You've made|You have made} some {decent|good|really good} points there. I {looked|checked} {on the internet|on the web|on the net} {for more info|for more information|to find out more|to learn more|for additional information} about the issue and found {most individuals|most people} will go along with your views on {this website|this site|this web site}.|
{Hi|Hello|Hi there|What's up}, I {log on to|check|read} your {new stuff|blogs|blog} {regularly|like every week|daily|on a regular basis}. Your {story-telling|writing|humoristic} style is {awesome|witty}, keep {doing what you're doing|up the good work|it up}!|
I {simply|just} {could not|couldn't} {leave|depart|go away} your {site|web site|website} {prior to|before} suggesting that I {really|extremely|actually} {enjoyed|loved} {the standard|the usual} {information|info} {a person|an individual} {supply|provide} {for your|on your|in your|to your} {visitors|guests}? Is {going to|gonna} be {back|again} {frequently|regularly|incessantly|steadily|ceaselessly|often|continuously} {in order to|to} {check up on|check out|inspect|investigate cross-check} new posts|
{I wanted|I needed|I want to|I need to} to thank you for this {great|excellent|fantastic|wonderful|good|very good} read!! I {definitely|certainly|absolutely} {enjoyed|loved} every {little bit of|bit of} it. {I have|I've got|I have got} you {bookmarked|book marked|book-marked|saved as a favorite} {to check out|to look at} new {stuff you|things you} post�\