All your gods are myths

It occurred to me while I drove to work this morning that I no longer care to say that I am an atheist because there isn’t any evidence for the existence of any gods. Evidence doesn’t even factor into it. Of course there is no evidence for any god, but why would there be? There isn’t evidence for made up things. I have no interest in debating this with anyone or pretending that there is anything to debate.

We all know that…

  • There isn’t enough water to flood the whole planet at once.
  • No one can live for days in the stomach of a fish.
  • Virgins don’t have babies.
  • Stars don’t point out the positions of imminent births.
  • Dead people don’t resurrect.
  • Natural disasters aren’t the results of an angry god.
  • And so on …

We do know that all of those kinds of things happened in myths. Now you can be like my extended family member who provides “scientifical” explanations for the things in the Bible, but who believes in it anyway, or you can be logical, and conclude that the Abrahamic religions are mythology and nothing more. Because that’s what they are. So are all the gods of all religions. We made them all up.

If stories contain elements that look just like myths, it’s because they are myths. It’s that simple. I will never again debate this with any sort of religious apologist. There is no point. Anyone who insists on bringing up their gods to me is simply not worth my time. When they do it at work, I can, of course, politely decline the debate. Online is another matter.

Cognitive dissonance is amusing

Firstly I must apologize… I don’t get time to write here much any more. But as I install a new laptop, I might as well write a little while I wait for the downloads to complete…

We have this application at work that someone else has been working on, an app to batch process a bunch of identification verifications for a third party. That is, given the ID number of thousands of people, determine whether they are valid identities, their marital status, deceased status, and so on. The people involved were having a discussion about optimizing it to first remove the ones we already have data on showing they are deceased. No need to reverify someone you already know is dead, I guess…

Of course, since it was just before the Easter weekend and all these people are Christian, I couldn’t help myself… So I was like… “How come you only have an alive and deceased status? What about resurrected? I mean, you all believe that resurrection is possible, right?”

They didn’t like my joke. Silly people.

But its a good point. You know that dead people don’t come back to life. But you also believe that one person did. That doesn’t make sense. It would be too easy for me to claim that deep down Christians know this shit doesn’t happen, and deep down they don’t believe… But that’s not how it works. That would be the same as my brother claiming that deep down I’m still a Roman Catholic. It would be projection. It’s easy to fall into that trap, to project our own beliefs onto others.

But real beliefs are more complicated. in reality, religious people can simultaneously know that resurrection is impossible, but also believe in the resurrection of Jesus. It’s stupid. And as long as you clowns believe in bullshit like that, this clown will mock you for it.

Happy Easter. Jesus didn’t resurrect because shit like that doesn’t happen. But I do believe in chocolate so I thank him for dying so that I may eat lots of chocolate.

Priest fired for saying the wrong magic words?

I wrote this post on Facebook last night and maybe it’s worth expanding here…

Earlier, Josh asked me to explain the definition of satire…

Funny how difficult it is (for me anyway) without looking it up. I explained it as using humour to criticize something, to mock it, and often using parody for the mocking part, which creates an equal but absurd criticism of the thing. So it uses humour but is really serious.

My example was telling him about that priest who was forced to resign because of 20 years of botched baptisms, because he said “WE baptize you in the name of Jesus” instead of “I baptize you…”, and that my parody of it was to write a status on here suggesting he botched the baptisms because he forgot to say “abracadabra”.

But it’s a great example, isn’t it? I mean, the more I think about it, the more similar it is. He didn’t say the right magic words in a meaningless ritual, and absurdly, the church now claims all those baptisms “don’t count”. It’s so fucking stupid, it almost parodies itself.

Imagine believing in such absolute fucking hogwash.

Here’s an article about that priest. The story is legit.

It’s even been commented on by Father Nathan Monk here… He’s a former priest but now atheist and writer as well as social media personality – one who often triggers angry Christians because he still uses the Father moniker. The thing is, he’s a qualified Catholic priest, so he an use that if he wants to. Anyway, his point is that the church isn’t playing by its own rules here… They allow any baptized person to perform a baptism in certain contexts, and accept baptisms from Christian converts of other Christian religions. So why be so hard on this priest? It’s fucking goofy.

Dinosaurs disprove god

Today I answered a question asked in a Facebook group, and I’d like to share my answer a little further by expanding on it here.

Firstly, I’ll start with the Facebook post and then go from there. Apologies for the messiness – the tool I used to use for screen grabs, where I then deleted the border colour so it matched the background here, is now broken on my machine, so this was made with the built-in Windows snipping tool.

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To put it into context, this somewhat silly group, Dinosaurs Against Christians Against Dinosaurs, is a parody/meme group, of the group Christians Against Dinosaurs, which itself is a parody of Christians who are against dinosaurs. So it’s a bit of a baffling group, an atheist group filled mostly with atheists who don’t realize that what they are parodying is already a parody. (Poe’s Law then.) At least that’s what it was, but at some point it became a pretty standard atheist group where atheists share atheist memes. And then it got funnier because it was infiltrated by hordes of Christians who constantly complain that the memes are mocking Christians rather than being about dinosaurs. To make things even more confusing, the last few days have seen posts by atheists mocking Christians complaining about the lack of dinosaurs as well as atheists writing posts that parody Christians mocking atheists – meanwhile the comments are filled with comments by other atheists who think they are responding to actual Christians, because presumably they don’t get sarcasm/parody/irony.

So imagine my surprise when I saw a question that, whether asked in good faith or not (it doesn’t matter) – can be answered seriously.

You see, the whole mess and all the parodies of it came about because at the root of all this, Biblical literalists are actually onto something. If the Bible were truly the word of “God”, who knows all things, and this god somehow wrote through the men who put pen to paper, it would certainly contain information about the dinosaurs. But it doesn’t. Further, the way Biblical literalists who call themselves Young Earth Creationists have calculated the age of the Earth, is more or less accurate if one assumes the Bible is literally true. Again, they’re onto something.

If the word of the Bible were truly inerrant, the planet should be about 6 000 years old. Dinosaurs, the last of which went extinct around 69 million years ago, thus prove two things:

  1. The Bible can’t be true. At least not literally.
  2. The Earth can’t be only 6 000 years old.

OK, maybe that’s not really two things. The main thing is, dinosaurs aren’t in the Bible because the men who wrote it didn’t know about them. And thus their imaginary god didn’t know about them either. But of course not. God doesn’t “know” anything because god isn’t real at all. But regardless, Biblical literalists are way smarter than most of us give them credit for… They’ve realized that dinosaurs being real proves their Bible isn’t literally true, and they are above what most Christians do with their cognitive dissonance… They know that once one bit of the Bible isn’t true, the narrative ball of string unravels, and the more you look at it, the more clear it becomes that all of the Bible is untrue. Therefore they invent their own “science” which makes leaps and bounds of ad hoc reasoning to claim that either dinosaurs aren’t real at all, or that they somehow existed less than 6 000 years ago and their god fakes the fossil record as some kind of test of their faith.

I find the whole thing quite hilarious. For an example of what Young Earth Creationists say about dinosaurs, you can head over to the page about it on the Answers in Genesis site. I must warn you though, their years of “study” don’t come close to the stuff I’ve written in a few minutes here off the top of my head.

Why do I mock religion?

Recently a creationist commenter posed some questions asking why I disbelieve in his god, questions which were hard to take seriously. I asked others for help on how to answer his comment without being sarcastic, but they were even more harsh than I was, calling it word salad, amongst other things. I did write a post in response to his lengthy comment, but it doesn’t feel right to me. Maybe I’ll still publish it, with his full comment text, but in the meantime, I’d much rather write about how I came to mock religion as I do now.

The idea for this one came to me via a memory, triggered by the way someone reacted to a Facebook post of mine yesterday, a post which led to me sharing this: (I don’t know why the FB embed is not displaying. It worked before publishing and now it isn’t, so I’m using an image instead.)

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Let’s wind back that clock, shall we? The year was 1985, my first year of high school. Standard six, or grade eight as they call it now. I’d had a fairly protected upbringing, by parents who were devout Roman Catholic, and my mother in particular was paranoid about other religions (their youth programs and so forth) being more fun than the Catholic Sunday school and youth programs we attended, which were very much old school.

That alone is ironic, come to think of it. In her own way, my mother recognized the harm of indoctrination, and was worried that my brother or I might be sucked into some other more modern church. (I highly doubt there was much of a chance of that happening to either of us, for different reasons. She should have given us more credit. Mind you, as a parent, I understand.) But getting back to the point, my protected upbringing meant my only exposure to Christianity was though the lens of our weekly attendance at Mass, and Sunday school. She didn’t even like the idea of us going to other Christian churches, which suited me fine because I didn’t much like the idea of that either.

So… imagine my surprise when some twat handed out Gideons Bibles at school and I actually read mine. It was the first time I didn’t get cherry picked Bible verses through the lens of the parish priest, and… wow! What a lot of bullshit! Fucking pages and pages and pages of lineages of men, such as Joseph. It’s like they just put random writings together. Sorry, I can’t refer to which chapter and verse because I’m not interested in looking that up, but clearly whoever made sure they showed that Joseph descended directly from David was unaware that he allegedly didn’t father Jesus. It’s blatantly obvious when reading that, that some writers were quite unaware of the daddy is god and mommy is a virgin claim, and at the time of that writing, Jesus was shown to be descended from David. (The same David who was mysteriously celebrated for taking a ranged weapon to hand to hand combat, and cheating, shooting his opponent before the man could even reach the battlefield. Kind of like taking a gun to a boxing match. That cunt.)

Further, it was blatantly obvious to me as a thirteen year old reading the Bible that it described all kinds of things that never happened. And I do mean never. Where does one go from this kind of revelation? Well, it seems most Christians just put that doubt out of their heads and find excuses to carry right on believing. I tried. I wanted to believe so I told myself that maybe some of the stuff was nonsense but the idea of god and Jesus and the creation and heaven were true. But I did also mock that stupid verse from Revelation. It struck me as hilarious that this was the source of the Beast, 666, and all that as used in various horror movies like The Omen. But actually read it and it’s a bunch of mumbo jumbo. So I wrote it all over the school desks (along with a couple of other things and drawings that I won’t mention here)… I wrote it along with the chapter and verse, and can you guess how other people responded? They didn’t believe those words actually came from the Bible. Because like me, they had never read it.

So you could say I had a crisis of faith, because I read the Bible. Because I saw it for what it really was. But I tried to hang on, force myself to keep believing, because to my father, being Catholic was very important. It was a strong part of his identity. I went through with my confirmation at age 14, and didn’t speak of my doubt to anyone. By the age of 15 my reasoning went like this: Why should I believe that other people, born into a different religion such as Islam, who believe just as sincerely as we do, will be punished for all eternity? Just because they were born to parents who taught them a different religion to me? Why? Even if I assume a god exists, why would he be so cruel? It’s a birth lottery; nothing more.

I’d lay awake at night wondering about such things. In some moments I did believe, and wonder why this god would punish those other innocent people. In other moments, theirs was the true religion, and I’d be the one to suffer in Hell because their god would punish me for being born into the wrong religion. And then like most people (I imagine), I’d put those thoughts away during the day and focus on other things that teenagers focused on.

I have mentioned before, a school acquaintance named Meri, from Finland, who prompted me to lose my faith. Perhaps I gave her too much credit, so this time, including the paragraphs before this one, I’m writing the whole story. That was my state of mind – extreme confusion, because I saw everything in the Bible as pure nonsense, and yet I believed, kind of. I clung to that belief with a thread. Then one day, I heard a girl crying. Her name was Meri, and she spoke with a funny accent. No one liked her because she was different. A group of boys were jeering and laughing at her and even my friend Dale, who I thought was a nice guy, was smirking at the absurdity of her not believing in god.

I approached her because I felt bad for her, because I was quiet and shy and different to most people, because I also isolated myself. So I asked her what this was about, and she asked me, “Do you believe in religion, and god?” I said “Yes, I do”, to which she responded, the tears barely dry in her eyes, “Why!? Why do you believe? It’s so stupid.” And just like that, seeing that it was acceptable to doubt, I stopped believing. Because I had no reason to believe. If I’d had the words to answer her in those few seconds before my belief vanished forever, I’d have said, “I believe because I’ve always believed, because I know that god is real. I know it in my heart.” But I didn’t know any such thing. That was the simple fact. The only words I could form were the sheepish, “I don’t know (why I believe)”, but the reality was, my mind was racing – I went from “knowing” god is real to knowing with absolute certainty that this god was made up by men.

I did at one stage believe that mocking religion, or scoffing at the absurdity of it, as she did, might trigger others to think, to have that moment of clarity and change their minds, as it did for me. But it’s never happened. Maybe I was naive to think it could? Most likely I think, it was inevitable that I’d end up atheist – the complete loss of faith was already cemented in my doubts and she just provided the final nail to crucify those beliefs. But regardless, that is only a small part of why I mock religion. At sixteen years old, I still thought that for the most part, religion was a good thing, that it taught useful virtues and values, and that religious people were good people. I was wrong.

I should have known from the way those good Christian boys treated Meri, but I didn’t see it. Not yet. But dear reader, doesn’t my story of her seem slightly familiar? And no, I don’t mean because I have written about her before. Others have made movies using a very similar plot. I’m thinking of Kevin Sorbo with his God’s Not Dead trash. It’s a familiar narrative, one shared by 1000001 edgy Facebook Christians who share their persecution narratives, except in their fiction, it’s atheists who condescend to them and bully them. Let me make this crystal fucking clear: We live in a credulous world where people, the majority are held together by blind faith and magical thinking, where most people are driven by apophenia and take comfort in their fictional everlasting life, where the atheists are the exceptions, and where we are very much at the receiving end of bullying and harassment. It’s been this way for hundreds of years.

Like it’s not bad enough that my parents were like two blind mice in their Catholicism and they made me spend all those Sunday morning wasting my fucking time in Mass and Sunday school, and all those months… actually years worrying about Hell and endless torment; like it’s not bad enough that my son had to be subjected to that bullshit too; we can’t even have Facebook groups especially for atheists without some willfully ignorant buffoons trying to proselytize to us and “save” us.

Your arguments are vapid, full of fallacies, ad hominem, appeals to irrelevant authority, argumentum ad populum, begging the question, and outright nonsense. And no, I don’t need expertise in fucking philosophy to reject your assumption that a creator exists. Philosophy isn’t about that – you’re simply equivocating, hiding behind words that you don’t understand to justify an assumption that makes no sense whatsoever, but is based on what you think you know with your brainwashed mind, not on evidence. And no, I do not need to know theology to understand that it is all nonsense when it is obvious from the outside that studying it is simply a matter of studying the innermost details of the made up shit. I don’t need to smear the shit on my nose to know that it stinks. And I certainly do not need to feel compelled to respond to such presumptuous passive aggressive statements masquerading as questions.

But by the way, there are many people who have studied theology and concluded that it is bullshit. And if you really want to play the argumentum ad populum game, then boy do I have bad news for you.

But getting back to my personal story, things took another turn when I was around 18. By then an atheist but not public about it, I spent a year in the old apartheid army, due to conscription. There I heard preachers preaching a strange brand of Christianity I hadn’t heard before, where they read “purity of races” right into their Bibles. I don’t remember what Bible verses once again, but it doesn’t matter. They were pretty convincing, to each other at least. So Christianity was used to justify racism and white supremacy, and a law known as the “Group Areas Act” back then which forced people of different colour to live in separate neighbourhoods. Since then I’ve heard of others with similar racism, people who claim that black people are the “sons of Nod”, the cursed descendants of Cain who murdered his brother Abel, and they use this to justify their belief that white people are superior.

You had to jump through some hoops for the racism to make sense just the same as you do for those who use the Bible to justify homophobia – where the righteous man, Lot, offered up his two daughters to be gang raped by a group of men who wanted to get to the two angels in his home. That verse is used to justify that the men were gay (because they wanted the angels). But it is OK that he offered them his daughters? Why offer his daughters to gay men? And why is it OK to offer women to be raped?

Speaking of Lot and family, his wife was allegedly turned to a pillar of salt for daring to turn her head. Who turned to witness this? But Lot one day got both his daughters pregnant and that’s not a problem. But by all means, don’t be gay. That’s wrong.

Right now, there are Americans spouting the same kind of rhetoric that the boneheads did in the old South Africa. In fact, they’re super popular among the right wing here. Racist scum, the lot of them!

Here’s a fact that too many people are blind to see: Extremism, while it may well exist only on the fringe, is the truest form of any ideology. Religion is all about elitism, the belief that you are right and everybody else is wrong. Taken to its natural extreme, it’s all about hate.

But just as many Christians are willingly blind and ignorant to the nonsense of their own religious texts, so are they blind to the hatred of their beliefs taken to the extreme. It’s not just that your beliefs are absurd, whether you’re like that commenter with his presumptuous Gish gallop of just asking questions, or you’re one of those edgy “I identify as black” white Christians attacking transgender people, or you’re an American politician hiding behind “traditional marriage” to justify homophobia, or you’re just a normal churchgoing person who turns a blind eye to all the harm that your religion does… I see through you. I mock you along with the subject of your belief, because you deserve it. By failing to open up your mind to reality, by not rejecting religion and all the harm that it does, even if you are not one of those vile evil people I have mentioned, you do enable them.

Apparently accepting multiple bullshit magic dudes at face value is better than accepting only one?

I soooo wanna reply to her in two days when my ban gets lifted. I’ll probably get unfriended but still…

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I believe English is not her first language (she’s Polish), so “yet we the same time brush off…” is an error. She’s Jewish. It’s a slight error but I’m mentioning it just to clarify what she means.

I find this reasoning baffling. Believing in multiple people doing the impossible and defying the laws of physics and reality isn’t better than believing in just one magic dude. You might be tempted to think it’s even worse, but not me… I’d say it’s about the same. One magic man vs many magic men – same shit, different dogma.

I always find it weird when people claim their religions are better than others. It’s like saying “My magic is the real magic because my magic is real.” Except it isn’t real. It’s just that you’re indoctrinated to believe in your magic and not the other magic.

It’s all bullshit.

Edit: Hey, this meme makes the same point…


I do think she makes one point though, by accident. There is a lot more going on in the Old Testament. God speaks to Abraham, commands men to cut off part of their penises, kills some dude for pulling out rather than impregnating his dead brother’s wife, there are many prophets, god himself gets to commit genocide more than once… A lot.

In fact, the tone is so different, it seems like a different god, and once you get past the superficial bits that appear to follow on, it should be clear that this isn’t the same god at all. It’s just a bunch of people with a new religion who appropriated the culture of an old one that they stole bits from. They even went as far as retconning the purpose of Judaism to be all about Jesus. Of course the Muslims retcon Christianity in a similar manner. I find it all quite hilarious.

Atheists don’t believe in gods. That’s the whole definition of atheism… technically.

Every now and then I see a nonsensical question something like this:

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But then, is it nonsensical? It is for me. (And all the other atheists who laugh reacted.) But I, and they, don’t speak for all atheists. Or do we?

Atheism is simply the disbelief in gods. That’s it. But ironically even that short definition is loaded, at least when I write it. I do not define it as the “disbelief in god”, but the “disbelief in gods”. There’s a subtle difference.

A theist, for example a Christian, might define atheism as the “disbelief in god”. That’s because they assume their god is real, and the concept of god itself is based solely on their own one. To them, their god is “God”, in other words “the god”. As for me, my concept of god changed. The Christian god claim is one of many. None of them are more significant than any of the others. The words of anyone’s religious texts thus aren’t useful or convincing, or evidence of anything other than that their claim exists.

When I was sixteen and stopped believing, I would have defined my own atheism as the “disbelief in god” because my concept of god was still based solely on the one I was taught about at my Roman Catholic church and Sunday School. But then I also still believed in an afterlife, so this is why the question interests me… But I’m getting ahead of myself.

Can an atheist believe in an afterlife?

Of course! You can believe in Tinkerbell, unicorns, whatever the fuck you want.

Should an atheist still believe in an afterlife?

Probably not.

The thing is, when you start to think critically, you logically adjust your beliefs. There’s a natural progression. Almost every critical thinker starts at the same place… The bearded magic man in the sky who created all the things. We all reject that idea right off the bat because it is obvious nonsense. Some people might stop there, and if that’s good enough for them, that’s OK.

But most of us atheists aren’t just atheists. We’re critical thinkers and skeptics. We examine why the idea of a god is silly, and it is because there’s no evidence. There isn’t any evidence of a “remote” mind being separate to our brains either. In other words, souls are made up things too. An afterlife is likewise a made up thing. Ghosts don’t exist outside of our imagination. And so it goes on. Of course we’d all like to be reunited one day with the people we love who have died. Of course we are all afraid of nonexistence, and the promise of life eternal is attractive, but no amount of wishful thinking makes these things real.

So sure… you could be an atheist who also believes in an afterlife, the supernatural, and so on. But if so, you are likely either new to atheism, or you’re an idiot. You can’t be a critical thinker and believe in such things though. If you believe in such things and call yourself a critical thinker, you’re wrong, but thanks to the Dunning Kruger effect, you won’t take my word for it.

To conclude, I don’t claim to speak for most atheists, technically. But just as I used “technically” in the title. I don’t speak for most, but technically I kind of do, because being an atheist, at least for those of us who started out religious, involves a process. We don’t shed all our irrational beliefs at once, but it happens gradually. So most of us will laugh at the idea of an atheist who believes in an afterlife.


A harsh as my words may seem, I have only recently begun to see what it means to be an atheist who never believed in the first place. My son, now 13 years old, is second generation atheist. For a while I didn’t have control of his upbringing and it seemed like he would be indoctrinated, but he is now definitely a nonbeliever. He doesn’t remember ever believing, and his view is much as I imagined mine would have been if I’d never believed at all. Things like the idea of a god are just plain silly to him, and that makes me proud.

He’s inherited my sarcasm too, so when religion is imposed on him, he can be quite rude about it. (Good.) But like many second generation atheists, he has not inherited my passion for going out of my way to mock creationists. As long as they don’t push their religion onto him, he leaves them be. (Even better.)

But… sorry loons. I won’t leave you alone. In fact, even if I were (hypothetically) to know that a loon reads this blog obsessively, looking for things to use against me, I’d deliberately sneak in the occasional bit of false ammunition that only he would understand for him to load his mental blanks now and then, just to fuck with him.

Atheism gives no reason to hate anyone

A friend shared this simple but powerful meme.

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If you don’t get it, you probably never will.

Knowing it’s probably pointless to explain it, I’m going to try anyway. We don’t believe we are special. We don’t believe in a deity that created the whole universe just to revolve around us. We don’t believe we are better than anyone else because of our beliefs, and that we are saved, or elite in any other way. We neither claim to have some kind of personal relationship with the creator of the entire universe, nor claim that people who don’t share this delusion of grandeur are somehow arrogant.

We don’t have rules about what we may wear or eat, or what women may wear, or what anyone may do with their genitals, that would allow us to claim that other people, or women, or people with different orientations to us, or people with genders that we don’t understand, are somehow inferior to us. As far as rules about sex go, the only two rules I’m aware of are:

  1. Do nothing without consent. And consent can be removed at any time, even during sex.
  2. Adults only. Don’t have sex with anyone underage.

We don’t do those things because we don’t follow any doctrine that has rules about how we should live our lives. So obviously we also don’t get to take other things like skin colour, which aren’t even in the religious texts, and use our beliefs as an excuse for those prejudices.

We don’t believe in an afterlife, or that we are special and will live on while the rest of humanity does not, or that people who believe differently to us will be punished for all eternity.We don’t believe in sin, in imaginary offenses against an imaginary god, and we don’t use our disbelief to judge others based on any such bizarre dogmatic nonsense.

In short, we don’t use our beliefs to justify prejudice and hatred.

Actually, when it comes to prejudices in general,  another friend friend said it better than me… I’m quoting a friend, Dumisani, who posted this to a group recently:

Ever noticed how bigotry hides itself behind “concern”.

Racists are concerned about how black teachers and students will bring down the standard of education of a school.

Xenophobes are concerned about how foreign nationals are stealing jobs, committing crime and just generally ruining the country.

Transphobes are concerned about how transgender women somehow take up space from real women i.e. cis gender women.

Homophobes are concerned about traditional and religious values.
Etc etc..

Granted, that’s not only about the religious… It’s about bigots in general. But have you noticed how often those ‘’concerns’ they use to justify their hatred are religious concerns?

[Afterthought: This doesn’t mean that atheists can’t be bigots. I used to be naïve enough to think that it did, but that’s not how it works. We don’t have beliefs that can be used as an excuse to be bigots. But people are often mean and malicious, vile disgusting things, so this doesn’t mean all atheists are good people. Some atheists are also cunts. But at least they don’t get to hide to behind religious “values”.]

Better not to be part of an ideology where you, at worst, use your beliefs as a reason to hate others, and at best, turn a blind eye to your fellow believers who do.

A reminder about the kind of creationist who debates atheists…

I just saw two of these in five minutes and I can’t not share them. I mean, what in the fuck? These people wonder why we laugh at them.

We have a few different styles here…

First, the asserter of… assertions.

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Secondly, we have the threatener of hellfire threats.

May be an image of text

And lastly, here’ a homophobe who wants to reclaim the rainbow during pride Month. Because… you know… the rainbow is what god gave us to remind himself not to slaughter billions of innocent people again. Or something.

May be an image of text that says "Yes, the OP posted this unironically. Lauren E. Witzke 5d It's June 1st and a time to remember EVERYTHING Jesus has done for us. Glory to God! #reclaimtherainbow JUNE IS CHRISTIANITY MONTH RECLAIM THE RAINBOW"

Now I’m not saying these people are idiots… hold up… this is not Facebook so I don’t have to try to avoid being banned – not that it help over there, mind you. Of course they’re idiots. There is no doubt.