I noticed that my posts about my mother have raised concern for at least one regular reader… So I’m writing this at lunch time at work; something I never normally do.
Don’t worry. I’m not depressed. Overall, I’m feeling pretty good about life. Not having my mother around combined with my laziness and habit of buying precooked meals, rather than eating her home-cooked meals every night as I was, has led to me losing a little weight. Not enough to be able to see it, mind you, but yesterday’s blood test results revealed that my cholesterol has actually gone down. Plus not smoking is going well. I’m actually healthier than I was.
But when I’m feeling down, I write about it. It feels good to let it out, and after a friend mentioned on Facebook that my statuses about my mother’s death help him deal with his feelings, I figured sharing them might be good not only for me. So I write them. This blog has become the outlet for a bunch of different things: my feelings about recovery; serious posts about atheism; serious posts about other humanism-related things like feminism; and sometimes I just pour my personal feelings out here. There’s no rhyme or reason – I just post what’s on my mind.
And with that, here are the two most recent photos of my mother. They were taken way back in 2014, at Josh’s sixth birthday party, and feature my mother pushing his sister Aishah, then 11 months old, on a swing.
I cannot emphasize enough how much I miss my mother.