More odd searches that found their way here

I’m having a mini crisis with self-confidence… not a big deal but it happens to me now and then. I’ve suffered with a lack of self-confidence since I was a child – back then I called it shyness. But whatever it is, it rears its ugly head from time to time, and lately that means my writing doesn’t have the usual conviction or passion behind it. Since I feel like writing anyway, I’m tackling an easy subject, a snarky response to some search strings that brought readers here…

Meth promiscuity paranoia

Now that’s easy… just like most meth addicts.

I suppose you got here because of the last time I responded to a search string (which was also the first time I did so on this blog. Funny how these things work.)

I’ve no idea if the person is asking whether meth makes people promiscuous, or paranoid, or both, but it doesn’t really matter because meth can definitely make you paranoid and can lead to promiscuity. It doesn’t make you promiscuous… no drug makes you take your clothes off and fuck some other random person or some other junkie or some dealer. You do that all on your own. It’s a choice just like the choice to use drugs. (You don’t get to duck on the responsibility for your actions just because you’re high. If that were the case, almost every criminal could be let off because they were high.) But meth does make you horny. Don’t blame the drug for your lack of self-control, or your partner’s lack of control, or your paranoia about your partner’s control. It’s your lack of self control that got you addicted and in your predicament to begin with. For more that actually answers the question without the sarcasm, see the post I linked to above.

Do meth have a good career?

My grammar am more better than yours.

Probably not. Meth doesn’t turn you into a monkey/donkey. It just makes you high. So if you have a high IQ, it doesn’t suddenly drop because you’re high on speed. If you have a good career and are clever, you can still work and be clever while you’re using meth. But keep in mind that the meth high is not conducive to excellent performance at work.

When you use, you stay awake for days and nights on end. The drug makes you feel awake and alert, but in reality, except for those first couple of minutes after a hit where you’re bouncing off the walls like a Gummy Bear, most of the time you are slower than normal. This is a natural consequence of sleep deprivation. You simply can’t perform well after being awake for more than a day or two.

Furthermore, meth makes you tweak. While tweaking, you become abnormally fascinated, obsessed with performing simple repetitive tasks. You get stuck doing them actually. Sometimes you can get stuck repeating something over and over for hours. And even when you work on complex, intellectually challenging tasks that require abstract thinking and high intellect, you won’t use your high intellect. No, you’ll just turn everything into simple, repetitive tasks. You’ll get stuck on a complex problem, and continue working on it at a frantic pace, making zero progress for hours, maybe even days. In short, you will find ways to fuck things up on meth, ways that would normally never happen.

Yah, I wrote some good source code when I was on meth, and came up with some clever programming solutions to complex problems. And I posted some of that code here. But so what? I don’t still have the bad code that I wrote on meth. That shit didn’t even compile.

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About Jerome

I am a senior C# developer in Johannesburg, South Africa. I am also a recovering addict, who spent nearly eight years using methamphetamine. I write on my recovery blog about my lessons learned and sometimes give advice to others who have made similar mistakes, often from my viewpoint as an atheist, and I also write some C# programming articles on my programming blog.
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