I was going to write a very different post, one that describes my feelings of sadness (and the reason for those feelings) , and how it affects me. The thing is, I wouldn’t have been able to deal with those feelings a couple (or three) years ago. That version of me would be back in active addiction now, and it is good not to be that person anymore. It’s bittersweet though because I still have the feelings of sadness. But maybe I’ll write that another day…
I’ve been escaping my feelings and triggers by playing this game for weeks. Here’s what my character looks like now: [Click for full-size image in new tab.]
Excuse her rude name… It’s an anagram for a certain bit of female anatomy that I always use as my female character’s name. Nobody has ever noticed though. (It’s not that complicated you know. Iris Colt — Colt Iris — Clot Iris — Clitoris. Why do people not see anagrams?) Anyway, she’s a dual wand-wielding “embermage” dealing massive amounts of elemental damage and has been great fun to play.
Although the game developers did a great job of keeping the game world balanced, in that no matter the character’s level, the monsters are always roughly the same difficulty, the main incentive to continue playing was always to get the character to level up. At level-up time, you assign character and skill points to build your character. Now this one can’t. About 10 levels ago, her “fame” progress stopped progressing. It still increments, but in such miniscule amounts it will never reach the end of that progress bar. Then earlier today, most of the way though my third time through the game (on difficulty level NG++, which means normal replayed twice), the experience points maxxed out. So I can still play to find better equipment (as finding better weapons, armour and items is the other part of building a great character), but otherwise the fun is over. I finished the game for the third time anyway, and it will allow me to “retrace my footsteps” but I’m not sure if I should bother.
Also there was an odd glitch this time around when playing. I can’t complete one of the side quests, called “robot parts” because on one level, four “gongs” must be hit to open the way to secret room. Somehow the map generated with one of the four gongs in a corner and unreachable, so I could not get that “robot part”. You can see that unfinished quest still listed in the screen shot.
A few years ago, I played a similar game, Diablo II, for months without ever reaching level 100. This one got there too quickly. I can play my son’s character, currently a level 28 “engineer”, which he wants me to do because he wants his character to be “strong” like mine. Or I can start a new character of my own, since mine does have a few skill points in redundant skills, but it would make little difference since the skills I actually use are also maxxed out.
Otherwise, I need to find something else to occupy my free time, since this game has taken my mind off my cravings and I don’t want my thoughts to go back there. This sucks.
If anyone knows of any similar PC games, which allow single player games, please let me know. My colleague told me about a good one called Path Of Exile, but I really prefer single player games. Or maybe I should buy an Xbox and play Diablo III? (I hear the Xbox version supports single-player games, but the PC one does not.)